Satvik's diary decoded

What a Sunday!

I woke up pretty early, err, I was woken up pretty early. The kosuru nap I took by lying down on my amma's lap after 6 30 in the morning was not exactly useful. But, like a good kid I did everything to get ready on time for thatha's 70th birthday celebrations. I even sacrificed the bucket dip for the bigger cause (pat on my back, please).

Appa was upset with delay caused because I had to be fed before being taken to the hall . I still can't understand why he behaved like that as me agreeing to eat in itself is a rarity.

I was happy to see Aadhi, Ameya and Atul, but in the crowd I felt like 'thriuvizhala tholanja kozhandhai' and my only solace in those times is to cling onto appa's legs; no, i didn't take inspiration from the lenovo ad. Actually, I can sue them for copying my style.

As usual, I didn't eat anything at the event. I came back and I behaved in a manner to justify my pet name "Duracell battery". While others in the house were sleeping, I found myself to be the lone watchman. Thank God, Arun Chithapa got a call and he woke up to answer it.

I hid myself behind the bedroom door and called him with the cuteness that only I can portray and only he can melt to. He happily showed me Thomas Train for half an hour on the PC thanks to google images.

So far so good. For whatever reason, Appa came under intense pressure for chellam kuduthufying me a bit too much. All that I did was refuse wearing a diaper. Now, how else could I convey to my dear father that I have grown up and will inform when appropriate. Appa got angry with me and shouted at me :(. I tried playing the divide and rule game and gave Arun chithappa 'good' tag, but somehow he suddenly became smart and spotted the bluff.

Lucky paati later drishti suthified for all of us, and my famous dislike for the liquid drishti pottu was pronounced by a loud cry from yours truly. I went for broke and was relentless and this angered Appa even more. On a normal day, someone had to play the good cop and console me and adakify the aggressor. But well, today was not one of those days. Amma also joined Appa and yelled at me.

Poor me, the only trick left for me was to curl up to big aane (my favourite blanket), suck my thumb and slip into slumber mode citing the excuse that I woke up early and did not sleep in the afternoon. Phew, now i know what a bad hair day means! when am i heading to the salon?

The new USA, our very own Johnnie Walker and the latest Wood in Indian Cinema

Everytime desi parents visit their software geek kid in US on those three month tourist visas, the second day will invariably be punctuated with the expression "Hope India some day becomes like USA"

Voila!That dream might get fulfilled soon with just a few men's efforts. With orchestrated teams of political leaders bartering fasts and feasts, what we might have are two sub states Telangana and Coastal Andhra that will represent our very own USA - The United States of Andhra.

When there are scores of farmer suicides because of lack of means to food in Vidharbha, the answer to that is to host International Cricket matches in Nagpur. That is how innovative our Agriculture Minister gets. However the equation is altogether different when the political honchos go for a few days without food. ~Ye Jo desh hei mera~
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The other visual hogging Indian news channels is a certain Jairam Ramesh who is always walking while talking to the press at Copenhagen. It is ironic as he paces through the Convention Centre and says "today is a wasted day and we don't have much to do!". Keep Walking! Not a bad message though delivered unintentionally.

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After Bollywood, Kollywood and Tollywood, here is the possible new entrant! For a change we are not talking about a certain Tiger Woods. The string of films that have released over the last few months and are shortly to bless the screens offering the other perspective to terrorism might just point to the emergence of a new film fraternity called Da-wood! Somehow it is tough to fathom how true Indian financiers who are grappling with aftermath of terror attacks right here would in their right mind fund such films. No offence to any religion but offering counter thoughts doing pseudo justice to terror thoughts is just not cool.

Maargo Maargo Maargazhi

So, it's that time of the year when all the silk sarees, ranging from Benares to Kanchivaram varieties spill out of the wardrobes;the month when Alwarpet and Mylapore have all the sabhas booked. RmKV and Pothy's will get adequate coverage in the TV channels for hosting mahotsavams.
Make up artists can make a fortune to make a 60 year old singer look like 40.
Welcome to the December Kutchery season in Chennai. This is the time when rookies would be praying to get atleast a noon time concert alloted in Music Academy. NRI Parents who have invested heavily on classical music for their kids would be making frantic calls to sabhas and vidhwans. This is the time when vidhwans can ask for return favours in the form of accomodation during foreign trips.
One thing I do vividly remember is how in our neighbouring Asthika Samajam, the secretary would be effusive with his praise for all the performing artistes; so much that I remember him only as 'Asaadhyam' Mama.
The concert format has improved over the years with interactive Q and A sessions and lucky draw winners. One has to be thankful to the efforts of TM Krishna, Soumya, Vijay Siva and other exponents of that generation to have revived the interest in youth for South Indian classical music.
With or without Arusuvai's canteen outside Music Academy, Chennai is most happening during the Maargazhi month.

Paa-th breaking effort

There have always been comparisons between Amitabh and Kamal as to who is THE actor who rules the scene.
Kamal with the versatility he has displayed over the last couple of decades and Amitabh's roaring comeback post the KBC era kept the two veterans tied in the race.
Then out of nowhere arrived this 12 year old progeria affected kid. He has redefined what acting is. Try to spot Amitabh in the film and you will have to wait till the last when the tired eyes sticks to a faint hope of reuniting his parents.
What a performance! What a poignant tale! Apart from Auro, Vidya Balan has shown the world yet again that dress sense at Page 3 parties is not the key to glory in Bollywood. The chemistry between her, Auro and Bum is awesome.
Abhishek Bhai - Please yaar - thoda to Acting seekh le yaar. Thankfully the others have put in a supra human effort to make sure that your lack of talent is covered up adequately.
Ilayaraja's music is nothing short of what only a Maestro can offer - Delicate, sensitive, a throw back to his Golden 80's.
In the last decade, there are a couple of categories of people who are trying their hand at cinema - The critics (yeeks) and we know what the famed popcorn munchers have contributed - Khalid Mehmood's shot at so called meaningful cinema ran dry after three attempts. Samir Karnik - The best 'behind the camera' comedian whose affinity to the Deols and Sohail Khan has only plummeted him further down in the box office charts. When is Mr Masand going to wield the megaphone? Atleast then the stress might reduce his ever explanding waist line.
The second - the ad gurus. And yummy, what a whiff of fresh air they have been. Prasoon Joshi's style of belting out lyrics is stunning - such effortless and practical poetry.
Finally, the man who is going around town saying this movie is less about progeria and more about the novelty of having Abhishek play the role of dad to his dad - R Balki.
Though I just do not agree with this premise - I am only thankful that someone of his calibre has directed a movie as moving as this.
So final analysis
Amitabh's Auro +1
Arundati and Vidya +2
Ilayaraja +1
Abhishek -1
PC Sreeram +1
Balki +1
So total 5
So here is the proof that Paa is really special :)

IPL ke Side effects

Akshay Kumar was not as zealous as these guys when he received the Olympic torch in Canada. Kapil Dev was more composed when he lifted the World Cup back in 1983.
But just see what IPL has done to the List A players of Indian cricket. Till the time they played for India only they had plump commercial endorsements like Reebok, Pepsi and Fancy Cars.
But no stand up comedian can achieve as much hilarity as the three Mumbai Indian caps have achieved in one single ad.
The passion, the pride that Sachin, Zaheer and Harbhajan Singh have exuded in the Zandu Balm ad makes me sit through even test matches in good humour (quite literally).
The final definitive image of the three showing off the pain reliever with hoardes others following and saying "Ek Balm Theen Kaam" surpasses Emami Fair and Handsome, Boro Plus and Revital ads with consummate ease.
I think the brief economic downturn left the FMCGs reeling under severe ad budgets. Dont worry guys, you have managed to garner mind space - for good or for bad is a no brainer.

heartisans - India themed souvenir collection

Whenever someone returns from India after a holiday or a business visit, the gifting options are typically shawls, carpets, sandalwood perfumes or kurtas and so on.
The same more or less applies to the tens of thousands of software engineers and others who return home for a Diwali or a Christmas break.
www.dilsebol.com/heartisans has a refreshing answer to break this monotony
without compromising on the local flavour.
heartisans is a collection that presents a range of designs that represents various Indian cities, states and the country as whole. You will find anything from the South Indian Degree Coffee to Delhi Metro to Gateway of India to Assamese Tea Plantations being expressed in a contemporary fashion. This is truly a heart crafted range!
The fascinating aspect is the flexibility dilsebol.com offers you to choose the product on which you want the design to be printed. The product range includes t shirts, coffee mugs, caps, aprons and fridge magnets.
There is no better platform that enables you to wear the pride of your roots on your sleeves, quite literally!
So, do let send me your feedback on the range and the user experience. Feel free to buy to your heart's content and spread the word around! There is something for everyone at heartisans - diversity was never so much fun!

All Izz is not well!

The Thamizh Film Directors Association was abuzz with activity early in the morning of a rainy Tuesday on Nov 10th. Four middle aged actors paced in to the office in Chennai and lodged a petition citing apathy meted out to them over the past five years.

As the TV cameras zoomed in, the familiar faces of Vivek, Charlie, Chinni Jayanth and Dhamu appeared sans the typical facial antics. They were clearly miffed that they were removed from the college scene rather prematurely.

After RK Silvermani heard their case patiently, he explained to them that they were in their early forties and that Suman Shetty, Santhanam and other dumuks have already taken their place.

Not to be bogged down, the college veterans argued that this is a clear case of discrmination, as Bollywood have called back Aamir Khan and Madhavan along with Sharman Joshi to the campuses through 3 Idiots.

Dhamu reiterates the point saying he possesed extra talents like mimicry and more importantly better hair dyes than his Bollywood counterparts.

Vivek was agitated and threw away his cooling glasses as a symbol of accepting his age. He added that there was no more a need to hide his age showing through his sagging eye bags.

Chinni Jayanth feeling left out had the last say " Jilku Jikkan Jikka, Bollywood hero enna Kokkaa".

Charlie as usual filled the space on the conference dias with his mute presence, a role he used to do with aplomb in movies with a lab record book in hand.

Is recession over?

Hurray! The recession is behind us…. Forget the sensex, forget the GDP numbers, forget the inflation percentage and forget mooted media bytes on revival.
There are some barometers that have no numbers but are very vital in signifying positive mood in the economy.

There are pamphlets distributed outside IT campuses.

Eunuchs are running around signals and establishments demanding their katthas.

The side middle berth is getting removed in some of the trains.

Sun Pictures has started releasing movies which are lighter (Maasilamani) than ‘Thee’ and ‘Kadhalil Vizhundhen’.

Some of the above may not be welcome, but these are pointers to some sunshine.. may the brightness resume!

Beyond Cricket

It is a world renowned fact that Cricket at any level unites Tambram Mamas across Chennai. The Triplicane tribe are walking Encyclopedias of statistics when it comes to even league cricket. An ICF all rounder of the 80's would still find a mention on discussions and debates on why India never had a quality all rounder after Kapil Dev.

But beyond cricket, there is another topic that makes them jump up and participate. Fondly referred to as 'Avan'(him), the Indian Railways plays an integral part in building acquaintances between unrelated Mamas in social gatherings like Nichayadarthams (engagement), weddings, naming ceremonies and the likes.

"Avan adichindu vandhutaan" is the biggest accolade a train gets for catching up after running late for most parts of the journey.
"Avan routa maathitaan" means the train's route has been changed. This is an all time favourite with Mamas as they would get travel tips for the next occasion.

Increased Tatkal seats, inclusion of middle berth in the sides are all developments which have caught the frenzy of the enlightened generation of late.

It is high time that Lalu va takes cognisance of the innumerable Advisors he could have for his Ministry and duly take their suggestions going forward.

BCCI's next big plans

Lalit Modi was pleasantly surprised when he woke up last Friday morning, as the entire world was reeling in a state of shock.
As he was skimming through ET and sipping his morning chai, he was thrilled to find out that Iceland had gone bankrupt.
Here is a country which was so close to the Mecca of Cricket that could be acquired with the brimming coffers of the Board of Cricket Control in India.
His 'Dil ki Awaaz' started to yell louder than ever before. No fight over stadiums but a full country all for himself and his ambitions to make cricket the most profitable business ever.
Since English players are hesitant to join the Indian Premier League, he hoped no such resitance would be felt once Iceland Premier League starts.
If the weather turns too chilly he can make T-20 cricket a two day event. That could bring in double the crowds for a single match.
He could build stadiums at will as there would be no farmers protesting against mass land acquisitions.
If he can hold 20-20 in Iceland's local time of 8 PM, then Indians who would have just completed watching the local IPL can gear up for the Icelandic edition. Higher sustained TRPs will do no harm. So what if it affects next day's productivity at work.
Just imagine, if South Africa or Australia could go bankrupt next, a country in southern hemisphere can provide summer all round the year for cricket!

The PM has a total sense of responsibility....

Well Manmohan Singh is a real lucky man. He is probably one of the few highly paid Public Servants in India reporting to foreign bosses.
He has an Italian to report into on what is going in the agreement with the US, and reports to the French Prime Minister on what happens within India in Karnataka and Orrisa.
If only we the people knew that our Prime Minister is responsible to explain the state of the nation to the Eurpean Union andnot to us, we would rather enrol ourselves for the ballot process in France.
The same Prime Minister who told the Opposition not to politicise Price rise, and told the nation to be united and not create tension on account of blasts that killed hunderds of fellow Indians is now explaining to the EU head as to what is happening to the Christians in the country.

On the flip side his is also an uneviable post. He is accountable to the western world for attacks on the Church. He is accountable to the Arab nations for any atrocities committed on the Muslims. Well, an attack on Hindus is just a cowardly act which they are supposed to be resilient to and not create an uproar against.
He should not be faulted though. Had the Hindu Kings of the past gone ahead on an acquisition and convrsion spree when they could afford to there could be some Hindu nations as well, which Mr Singh would have preferred to report to... because he is not reporting to the electorate that pushed him to where he is today.

Recently came to hear that Ram Leela in New Delhi are to close down by 10 or 11 at night pwing to security issues. Hope the same rule applied for Ramzan in Bangalore. Well giving an equal right to Hindus is unsecular in a country where Indian Muslim League is a secular party whereas BJP is not.

I have nothing against followers of other religions, but without any help from the Britishers, the current top brass of poilticians have indeed mastered the act of divide and rule.

Country Drub

His reach was limited to the Hoardings along the main roads in South Indian cities. Then he would eavesdrop though his wide hat into our compounds through countless brochures.
Then his endearing photos were featured in sponsored columns with newspapers. He would feature with the best of the worst tinsel town glam girls.
Thankfully, he has exercised abundant caution and managed to keep his cheer away from innocent Gabbar Singh fearing children, and refrained from featuring himself
In the prime time advertisements in national news channels.
The Swayambu King of Leisure and Pleasure, Y Rajeev Reddy is now omni present.
For some weird reason, he thinks that he is the Best Brand Ambassador for his enterprise, ala Virgin’s Richard Branson.
The self styled Black Boot to Black Hat attire with his thumbs up in the air is a trademark of this Recreation Czar.
But alas, he doesn’t stop there. If any of you have been lucky enough to get a copy of the brochure that talks about adventure holidays, you would find amidst the now familiar two parents two kid family, atop an elephant, a cute middle aged homosapien with a mulberry worm mush and a Bermudas to hat brown clad attire smiling gleefully with the thumbs up pose intact.
Is he some two amusement park or something? Has no one told him that his image on all his printed ads is perhaps a deal breaker and not a deal clincher.
Once I dared to quench my curiosity and arranged for a meeting with one of the sales executives of the Club, and he offered me one plot free with a lifetime membership. He studied my silence for a couple of minutes, and went to add that I could also get one more complimentary plot to the complimentary plot if I sign up for membership on the same day! With these kind of offers on display,
I tend to ask myself as to Y? Rajeev Reddy thrusts his image on us at every single opportunity. Watch out for the Clown in Sheikh Dress and diving down in a parachute!! Hilarious boss!

Breaking News! Its a Vaaman 'Exclusive'!

That's precisely one word that carries no exclusivity in News Channels!
Amitabh Bachchan catches cold in Mumbai!
Vengsarkar picks out Dravid for exclusion as he is a soft target!
Father kills daughter over Extra Marital Affair!
Scarlett Raped and Murdered after being Drugged!
Fantastic! My IQ seems to soaring exponentilly over the last few months!
Extra Marital Affairs, Cricket Selections, Gory Gory Blood Scenes after Bomb Blasts..
Price rise, persistent followup on national security issues, Impact of Reservations, Implementation of Govt Plans are issues not worth dabbling about for thse bunch of exclusive news channels...
Forget all this, why is that all inspiring stories on a village underprivileged, an idli vendor's
son making it to the IIM and subsequently stating a catering chain find mention as snippets at the very end of each news magazine.
Are all our lives ebing with unlimited joys that we yearn for such depressing and irrelevent news in prime time news? Can we have a more Pan India coverage that brings Good news across the nation and cheer us all and help us keep our Heads high?

Sister Stella(r)!

God’s Own Country is famous for two things. One that is universally acclaimed and well document is the natural splendour that perennially blesses the state with plenty.

That other thing that is universally acclaimed but not adequately documented unlike the Mumbai dabbawallahs is the gift to mankind in the form of Nairs who dutifully set up a tea shop the moment the population per 100 sq mtrs in any area is more than 10.

However, what remains an enigma is the reason why 98% of nurses are Mallus. What makes them stand out? If the warmth with which they treat every patient is anything to go by, there is no other reason required to prove why Kerala ranks supreme in hospitality.
Tresa, Jini, Biji are all hospitalhold names I guess. Does Kerala state govt provide subsidized education for courses in hospital-ity?
The smiles range from warm to super warm…. (Since I am talking about hospital nurses and not Kingfisher air hostesses, I am not using words like hot and …..)

But the serious question again is , why Mallus, and not anyone else… Any thoughts?

How will it end?

There is a never before hype about this one. Everyone wants to have their say.
This is the question that is gripping the public of West Mambalam
How will the seventh release of ‘Lorry Water’ scheduled for tomorrow end?

Insignificant Opinions Ltd, the leading dip stick survey service providers did their best in the heat, collected opinions from almost every street and have listed the top five possibilities:

Visalam maami picking up a fight with Kousalya Maami
Metro Water giving dimki as usual and not turning up
Lorry Driver arrives triumphantly after bashing one more unsuspecting school kid on the way
The Lorry cleaner gets bashed up by local residents for demanding extra bucks for the timely service
The most unlikely ending would be none of the above!
Let’s all wait for the action to unfold and see who guessed it right!

Sindhanais

Oru Vaanam Pala Desam
Oru Ennam Pala Vannam
Oru Nokkam Pala Padhai
Oru Needhi Pala Sattam
Oru Mugam Pala Vesham
Oru Karuthu Pala Mozhigal
Oru Nilam Pala Thotram
Oru Udal Pala Unarchigal
Iru Uyir Ore Moochh

A city in the making...eternally

The endearing honks,
The F1 quality cabbies,
Action all around,
Filled with dynamic inertia

Six directions of traffic,
On a two lane road,
Survival of the fittest
Victory for the meanest

Rising from the greens,
Concrete crass in the name
Of civilization and progress
An immature city in its teens

Masses flock here
To make a living
In this focused quest
We forget to make a life

The heart is binary
The heart is intuitive
The heart is unadulterated
Listen to it, Listen to it.

Verum Kanava? Kaanal Neera?

Erimalai Ponra Vaazhkaiyil
Aangaange Oru Poonthottam
Oru Vaarathil Irendu Naal
Pottal Dhaan Enna Kondattam

Anbargoludu Oru Sila Mani Neram
Kadarkarayil Sila Nimidam Amaidhi
Sombal Murikamal Adhiganeram Urakkam
Mugavari Illadha Idathil Tholaivoma?

Dinasari Alaichalai Konjam Marandhu
Thalaiku Mel Vetta Velicha aagayam
Kaalin keezh Methai Ponra Pulveli
Thirumba Oduvadharku Thevayana Marundhu

Pookalin Nirangalai Rasipadharkum
Ain pulangalin Magathuvam Arivadhirkum
Pozhudhupokku galai Seendi Paarkavum
Ketpadhellam Irendu Naal Vidumurai

Payanangal

Thodangi vittom Payanathai
Mudivai noki vegamaai selgirom
Kadaisi Mile kal Enna Vendru
Innum Nirnaikka Neram Illai

Nedunjaalaigal Vazhiyil Sila
Otrai adi paadhaigalo Pala
Thadai karkal pala nooru
Pallam paalam Sila nooru

Paadhi Vazhiyil Sandhegam
Sellum Vazhi Sirandhadha?
Serum Idam Uyarndhadha?
Indha paadhayil veroruvarume illaye?

Magizhvikka Aangaange Porkalangal
Sindhikavaika Appapodhu siriya Tholvigal
Potti Potu Jeyipadharku Sila Payanangal
Rasithu Anubavikave Vaazhkai Enum Payanam

Pesinaa dhaan enna?

Ulagarindha Ezhu Swarangal
Sa Ri Ga Ma Pa Da Nee
Mounam Ennum EttaamSwaram
Kandupidithaval Dhaane Nee

Nee Pesum Andha Vaarthaigalai
Maalayaga Kothu paarthal
Ara Mozham Malli Kooda
Neelomo endru Thonudhe

Nanbargal Or Aayiram
Ellayatra Vambu Vedikkai
Un Pechuku Enguvadhe
Ennoda Putham Pudhu Vaadikai

Bombay Mazhai Pol Pozhiyavum Vendaam
Madras Kozha Pol Emaathavum Vendaam
Sorkalai Semipadhal Selvam Servadhumillai
Mounakarargaluku Sorgam Urudhiyum Illai

Pesen, Please pesen, ada pesi tholayen!! :)