27 August, 2006

It's Tamil this time!

Why spare my mother tongue.. after torturing all my readers with poems in English, I thought I will pen one in Tamil.. So here it goes!

Mounam Saadhikum Idhazhgale
Kolam Podum Kolusu Kaalgale
Idhu Kaadhala Verum kaanala
Unarchiku Vizhigal Or Kaavala

Vandhaai Paarthaai Venraaiye
Caesar Kulathu Pen neeyo
Inum Kidaikavilai En Idhayam
Thirudiyadhu azhagiya theeyo

Malargalin Vaasam Nee Dhaano
Naan Utkollum Swaasam Nee Dhaano
Mounathin Vilakkam Ariyeno
Un Idhayathil Vasipadhu Adiyeno

Idhu eppadi irukku ;)

25 August, 2006

Coffee with Karan

As I was completing my routine jog around the MCG today morning, I spotted a curious tourist, who looked very familiar. He was just stretching his hands out and looking towards the sky and trying to picture someone in front of the majestic stadium. It was at that time, my mental google popped up with one search result…. The one and only Karan Johar

Knowing fairly well that he cant say no to coffee, I asked him if we could have guppa over a cup of coffee, and he obliged as expected.

So what transpired in the ten minute tete-a-tete was a free exchange of concerns and ideas..here are the excerpts

Me: So Karan, what brings you to Down Under.. leaving your adopted metropolis, NewYork

Karan: Shahrukh complained to me that he was bored of enacting his trademark ‘spread the arms-look up to the sky- release that fatally explosive constipated smile’ act in London and New York.. so here I am scouting for a new location, and have almost finalized on MCG for the next project

Me (*thrilled): So, you have got the concept ready for your next project?
Karan:You must be kidding. Story, Screenplay and Dialogues will follow later. All my projects begin with addressing Shah Rukh ‘s whims and fancies

Me: Just between the two of us. Can you please tell me how you ensured every Indian watched KANK in the first week

Karan:That’s a simple trick. If they praise the product, I ask them to spread the word, and if they come up to me taking an unfavourable stand even without watching the movie , I give them a cold stare and tell them not to go by some word of mouth, and find out for themselves J. Either way, they land up watching the movie.

Me: What is the idea behind making movies that span for more than three hours. I presume you have a misconception about an eternal classic. Just to clarify, it is certainly not a movie that goes on till eternity.

Karan: See, this is where my second source of revenue comes into the picture. I don’t care if the movie goer cries all through the movie, but what is important is that the snacks counter folks should laugh their way to the Bank, so I make it as long as possible so that the sale of popcorn and cool drinks increase manifold, and I take a cut from that too!

Me: What about your third source of revenue which is from the sale of DVDs?
Karan: Good that you brought about this point. To be honest, I am not expecting great returns from DVD sales, and instead I have struck gold with KANK, by contracting with the para military forces. The deal is that, whenever they run out of tear gas during any riot control operations, they would screen KANK on the streets, to bring about the same effect. Is there a better way to make people weep for more than three hours?

He then excused himself as he had to catch the next flight to Sydney, to check if the Opera House was a viable option as well. By then I was awestruck by the innovative commercial acumen of Johar Junior, and felt reassured that Bollywood was in very safe hands indeed.

Total Disclaimer: The entire episode is purely a figment of my imagination (right from the morning jog till the feeling of reassurance)

23 August, 2006

Impossible says I'm possible

It is just the power to see
That’s been snatched away
No one can clinch from us
The right to have a vision

We may not be provided
With The gift of the gab
But with sheer determination
Are sure to make a statement

So what if fate has been cruel
Not allowing us to walk at will
We still can achieve so much
The world will march behind us

You need to be a bit louder
We cant pick up mild noises
It is just the failure to hear
But to succeed, we are here.

Mere sympathies fail to work
In miracles we seldom trust
A level playing field we need
To prove, we can be the best

Inspired by true story of Siddharth (http://in.rediff.com/money/2006/aug/23sid.htm) and countless other unpublished success stories...

20 August, 2006

Laloo IIM Prasad and the Mahim Madness

Story 1: Laloo is going to be invited to IIM Ahmedabad to deliver guest lectures on management strategies!! Bewildered? This is no political gimmick but based on sheer weight of performance involved in turning around the loss making Indian Railways to a corporation that has cash reserve of Rs 1100 crores, in a two year span. Our Hon'ble Railway Minister has managed to turn the tables around, has happened with minimum impact on the
everyday passenger, and deftly increasing freight rates to ensure profitability. There is certainly more method than madness in this wily politician now.

Story 2: August 2005 – The entire city of Mumbai lashed back at the Mumbai administration for not having been able to effectively carry out disaster management after the furious floods played havoc on the city’s landscape. They were looking for a more responsible Govt to warn them of such impending catastrophes in advance so that lives can be saved

Fast forward into August 2006 – Mahim creek water turns sweet.. I must admit that if there is one stretch in Mumbai rail network that can wake you up even if you manage to doze off in the crowded compartments, it is the stench from the creek between Mahim and Bandra. As the news of the ‘miracle’ spread amongst the Mumbaikars, they wanted to have first hand information on this, and so they start to taste the sea water. This frenzy continues despite being warned adequately by the district officials that it is very much likely that water borne bacterial diseases could emanate from the Mahim waters. Not sure what exactly the people want the administration to do if they are not inclined to listen to such simple instructions.
Maybe this would even prompt Pepsi to abandon the “Pepsi is safer than Tea” campaign and take up “Pepsi is safer than Mahim water” campaign soon.

Kalyug is in full swing with politicians attempting to turn a new leaf, and the public blisfully prefers to tread the path of 'informed ignorance'.

08 August, 2006

Maverick School of Intuitive Entrepreneurship

Only God knows what prompted this title, but when I was discussing with my colleague at work, as to how it feels more rewarding when you know that you have created a pie of value, then just get a share of the pie by virtue of being in a vantage position, I just got this term out of the blue and this has sort of stuck with me thro the evening.

I have not read any biography or autobiography of any great entrepreneur, but for Maverick, which talks about the revolutionary path adopted by Semco, after it was taken over by its second generation leader Ricardo Semler.

Here is a brief note on how I classify entrepreneurs. I have not analysed their history or growth path, but these are just my views at a superficial level.

The by the book, value system entrepreneur – He who believes that investing in a value system is as important as strategizing a business model. NR Narayana Moorthy is the brand ambassador for this enviable breed. One of the most revered industrialists in India, his institution stands testimony to the fact that, when you do what you think is right and most importantly what most others think is right, and the time will come, where you will surely shine.

The second generation entrepreneur – Azim Premji is an amazing example of how as a second generation entrepreneur, you can take the organization that you have inherited to the next level, and not squander your father’s wealth to restrict the money to his generation. I don’t think it is very easy to run a business when a thousand people view you as the leader born out of autocracy than out of democracy. To take no cognizance of that, and proving your mettle time and again is no mean joke.

Vijay Mallya also breaks into this league, and he is a second generation leader whose flamboyant lifestyle is viewed as a sign of vanity, and with greater degree of attention, whereas one cannot take away the credit he deserves for revamping and rebranding the UB group, and the way he has ventured into the airline sector.

The aggressive.. Annihilate the competitor mould – None other than Dhirubhai Hirachand Ambani can epiomise this variety. With humble beginnings as a worker in a petrol pump in the Gulf, his vision and the confidence that he can make a difference to the way business is run in India, is unparalleled. The way he went about building an empire with steadfast commitment, his trust on the famed Inner circle and the ability to topple competition with both grit and tact, right from the time he played with the happiness of a bear cartel running against him when he was a nascent entrepreneur, till his vision of 10 paise mobile phone are just pages out of the epic called Dhirubhai, the real Ambani.

Maverick Entrepreneur – This clan is my favourite. The eccentric attitude often acts as an opaque mask behind which is this absolutely astute master of business. The potential to hog the limelight is a given for them. The one person who standsout in this category is Richard Branson. The way he posed as a girl at the launch of Virgin, was a path breaking effort J. His simple idea of welcoming all the passengers aboard his fleet by imprinting a message with his autograph is not something that goes unnoticed if you are a leisure traveler. If there is one autobiography I would love to fetch from the racks, it would be “Losing my virginity” by Branson.

Just in case you get an impression that this post was boring, please do let me know, and I will switch back to my more cozy style of writing… stepping out of comfort zones, occasionally is not that harmful though. J