Vidya Balan all the way this new year!!

After a stunning debut in Parineeta, and a breezy performance in Lage Raho Muna bhai, Vidya Balan is all set to tantalize me and my fellow fans this month, first in Guru, the Maniratnam ensemble, a movie tightly etched on life and times of Dhirubhai, releasing this Friday, and later on the 26th, in Salaam e ishq, a Nikhil Advani ensemble believed to be on the lines of Love Actually..

Whats more, we have Eklavyaa, where Vidhu Vinod Chopra makes a directorial comeback after six years ready for release next month

Each of these movies has Vidya Balan in strikingly different roles, and there is no doubt that her performances are going to warm the hearts of the audience.. All the best to the true Pari of Bollywood!

P.S: Pramod – This might sound way too IMDBish I know.. So your comment can be anything other than praising me on my in-depth knowledge of this domain… J

Choices, voices and more

One doesn’t have a choice
With what has been given
What one makes out of it
Depends on how one is driven

- Yours truly

A couple of instances, in a span of minutes that actually fuelled these thoughts

Scene 1: Bandra foot overbridge – A beggar with crippled legs seeking alms from another polio inflicted person limping past him. Now the latter could have chosen to go the relatively easy way, but he chose to face the world..take it on with full zest, and be independent

Scene 2: As I climb down the stairs, I see two guys at the railway platform, and one of them was having the Reliance Prepaid promo bag strapped across his shoulders,which said ‘mujhme hei wo baath”, and he was busily miming his thoughts across to his friend…

Need I say more?

Wish you all a very happy new year! May 2007 and the years following that (just to clarify, I didnt mean 05/07) bring unlimited joy and infinite reasons to celebrate life!

Kaasimedu Raayar

Buoyed by the success of James Bond’s recent success globally, Kollywood has decided to cash in and remake 'Casino Royale' as 'Kaasimedu Raayar'.. did you see that initial teaser campaign featuring the intro song which as usual has been sung by Shankar Mahadevan whose rendition of intro songs is as predictable as Himesh Saab’s item numbers (~ A A Asikee Aasiki = Jhalak Dikh Laa ja= Aashik banaaya aapne~) and set to tune by none other than entry song patent holder Vidyasagar…

If you have missed to catch a glimpse of the rushes that has led to a few crushes, the start goes like this…

Porathu Podhum Pongi Ezhu
Naan Indha Thamizh Not Ezhu (007 nu sollaraaru baa)
Neeyo Naayar Avano Laayar
Naan Dhaan da….Da Da Da.. (echo effikt)
…….Kaasimetu Raayaru (glaring at the camera with the blood shot eyes))

Poduvaaru Draayarr Kasimetu Raayar (chorus at 60 decibels -low pitch)
Poduvaaru Draayarr Kasimetu Raayar (chorus at 120 decibels- ach pitch)

Now what is so unique about this? Just like how airports across the world are revamping their architecture to welcome the A380 into their facility, the multiplexes are planning to combine all screens together so that they can actually project the 7 Vijayakanths on a single screen (the matrix ishtyle intro). Currently only Prarthana theatre is geared up to showcase this spectacle as the screen is 7 storey tall and two buildings wide…

Looking forward to yet another rocking performance from Captain!

Dada(giri) Returns, with a Bong!

During the third one-dayer against south Africa,when India were tottering around on the field hapless as usual, Robin Jackmann asked Ravi Shastri a simple question “ Raaavi…Where are the Laxmans and Gangulys” .. Ravi Shastri was diplomatic.. “Robin.. Laxman will definitely be back in the Test side” and preferred to go silent on Ganguly's chances…

The BCCI selection committee has answered Robin’s question, and so our beloved Dada is back in the test side…And if you thought Ganguly’s return to the Indian team is more of a political move, than one taken on sporting merit, let me present to you excerpts from the first press meet that Sourav had after being called back…. You can draw your own conclusions from some extremely thought provoking answers from the Bengal Cat (A tiger that doesn’t roar)

Q: You have always been optimistic about returning to the team earlier than what most people would think, and your faith has paid off

Dada: Yes, I was always sure that I will win the vote of confidence of the majority of people who matter

Q: You also insisted that retirement was never on your mind..

Dada: Of course, there are some games, where there is no mandatory age for retirement, and you can continue to play till you have the will

Q: You even gave up Bengal captaincy in the wake of a probability that you might make it to Team India

Dada: I read somewhere that one can't hold two offices of profit simultaneously..so I thought I may not qualify to join the Team in Blue, if I continued captaining West Bengal Ranji team

Q: Sharad Pawar had a word with the BCCI selectors before the team was announced. Do you think running an organization with dual power centres is good in the long run

Dada: Depends on how you define long run. The country is running on dual power centre model for the last two years and likely to last for another three years, this way. Is this long term or short term, or has this hampered the country’s progress?

Q: Your form per se has not been really great either in county or in Ranji. What do you think contributed to your inclusion.

Dada: Anti-incumbency. Either you do well, or wait for others to do badly. (* the naughty Prince of Calcutta smile just got bigger than ever*)

Q: Finally, your relationship with the coach is not enviable by any standards. How do you think you are going to get along in your second stint

Dada: In this game, there are no permanent enemies or permanent friends. Situations change, and along with that, people also need to change.

The entire media contingent were awestruck by the pearls of wisdom from the former captain, and they actually thought they were interviewing Buddhadeb Bhattacharjee before the West Bengal State elections!

A String of relationships

How much of a difference does a string make to a person, and how much is it used to signify relationships…I can think of half a dozen strings /threads right away that substantiates this.

The rakhee tied to reinforce the bonding between a brother and sister, by birth or otherwise

The string that is tied on the wrist, and sometimes around the hip ;) to ward off the evil eye

The mangal suthra that symbolizes the start of married life for the woman,

The sacred thread that symbolizes the beginning of brahmacharya for a boy

The strings that are tied around the branches of trees in temples which denotes a prayer for well being of a beloved, or any desire for that matter

It is quite easy to understand this, as the tighter these strings are tied, the stronger and longer it lasts.. simple isn’t it?

By the way, I was saying that I can think of six strings and have mentioned only five……on hind sight.. thought would leave out the sixth, as this blog is rated as ‘G’… … please switch off your dirty brain cells that is looking to add two and two here ;)

This one's for you, my Raakhi-ng sis! :)

This little eight liner is presented in a rather unconventional format
But hope this conveys the meaning that it sets out to :)

When we met after a decade, time just froze
When we get to talk, distances simply decrease
The friendly warmth , makes me feel at home
Are you the fridge, or are you the room heater?

If you are Q, then I am U,
Regardless of what happens
I will remain your shadow,
I will always be beside you...

Your's,
No longer raakhi-ng bro

Arun, the Spammer!

Like every other sane person, I also get annoyed and irritated when I get emails from “Mmary” with a subject “Re:Your ticket to fantasy”. . Therefore, atleast corporates should have effective spam identification and removal rules, to ensure that employees don’t get disturbed by such crappy spams. And here is a company that takes this way too seriously...

Being a criminal is one thing and having a criminal brain is another. Extrapolating that.. being a spammer is one thing and having a spammer brain is another.. Here I was innocently sending a mail to my friends that I was planning a holiday in December, and that gets tagged as a spam as the subject line and the first line of the body of the message had the same text.

So the next mail, I had ensured that the mail subject line and content were not the same. Didn’t help much as the message was again as tagged as spam, because the body contained the word ‘virgin’. All I was telling him was that I would be flying back by Virgin Airlines L….

Since then, I have focused more on the subject and the text of the message than the actual content, and though this does not give as much high as hacking, it does give a very cheap thrill when the mail actually passes through as a non spam mail!

Incredible India, well.......

Diverse cultures that infuse inclusivity
Communities that claim exclusivity
A nation is not built by mere numbers
People need to wake up from deep slumber

Was looking forward to a pleasant experience
A day that would increase national pride
Behaviour marking unprecedented indifference
All my expectations were taken for a royal ride

An event organised to showcase the identity
That we are one for all, and all for one
To a nation that is sportive and supportive
The incorrigible outlook, managed to impress none

A premise that education is an answer
To combat poverty and communalism
Was proven wrong with consummate ease
Ironically, on Diwali, it was darkness that prevailed

Finally it has Donned on me!

The movie buff in me wakes up every Thursday, and works feverishly to decide on the movie that would going to set the pace for that weekend.
And today, I just realized that I am actually looking forward to a Shah Rukh film, the Bollywood equivalent of Kollywood’s Vijayakanth. Theiir approach is going to be the same, irrespective of the character, still they rule the masses, either with sheer screen presence, metaphorically and literally respectively, or unintended comic sense.

The only difference this time, is that the movie I am looking forward to, incidentally has Shah Rukh, and to me he is not the one who will steal the show. I expect Boman Irani to steal the show, and Priyanka Chopra to steal my heart yet again J. If Shah Rukh sings ~Mein Hoon Kaun~, he might just get the best prize for winning the Fancy Dress competition for aping Big B.
And Farhan Akhtar’s technical finesse is something I am really excited about…

So, To see or not too see is not the question. when to see is the only question!

Reality Bytes

There is something about these reality shows that keeps me rooted to my seat, and watch it till the very end of the episode, even feeling uncomfortable to switch channels during ad breaks. Am I addicted to these shows? No. However, when I switch on the TV if there is a reality show on air, I find it tough to give it a miss….

So much so that, when I have lunch at home, and I find that the sambhar that I cooked is less spicy, my laziness prevents me to get up and get some salt or pickles, and I all I need to do is just switch on the TV and Dr Phil guarantees adequate masala to keep me quiet and supplements my bland food effectively. Not a single case where he has given a firm direction, and whats more, end of the episode, he asks his clients, who are fresh from serial domestic fights, whether they want professional advice to bring them to peace, one wonders, what he was doing consuming valuable air time.. nevertheless it is engrossing and entertaining. Lakshmi in Tamil sob show “Kadhai alla Nijam” has a long way to go if she has to reach the dizzying iconic status that Dr Phil has achieved in preaching nothing.

Dinner time, and the judges of Australian Idol, Mark Holden, Marcia Hines and Kyle Sandilands, ensure that the viewers are taken on a roller coaster ride of emotions, not seen even in a Sooraj Barjatiya movie. I am not a great fan of Firang music, so I really can’t appreciate when a singer actually sings well. But unmindful of the limitations, I enjoy this show for the melodrama despite the predictability in the character sketches of the judges.

I actually grew nervous when Aus Idol got over (I think its over J ), when I chanced on an episode of Survivor. My God.. Innovative bitching on co survivors behind one’s back is the USP of this show…extended my dinner intake because of this show!

If I go any further in this direction, I might prefer Big Brother to a Captain Flick.. May the Force be with me, and stop me from treading this unacceptable path…

All the world is a stage

Chennai – Melbourne –Accra. Nandan Nilekani’s vision of winning in a flat world was slightly modified to ‘Playing in a Flat world’. This was possibly just the fourth time in my life that I was performing on stage. The interesting aspect being, no two times with the same exploits.
This time around, I was part of a students’ ensemble playing the Djembe, which is a West African drum, an instrument I have been learning for three months now. We were performing at the Esplanade which is one of the oldest Hotels/ Pubs in St Kilda which is the Summer Capital of Melbourne for its beach and added fun and frolic ;).

Our part lasted for just about ten minutes, but it was truly memorable. Since this was the first gig that I was performing in, the intial moments were jittery, but once into the groove, it was masti! I had a bout of nerves, before the event, but after I saw my fellow performers already down with a couple of beers waiting for our turn, I just told myself that it would not be as tough I thought it would be.
Once on stage, I had the shock of the evening, when I found that only one of classmates was on stage, and the rest from a different batch! Fearing that I was possible ascended on to the stage earlier than required, I checked with my teacher, if I was in the right place, and only later did I realize that rest of my class mates were sitting on the chairs they had brought for the event, and hence were occupying the first quarter of the audience space themselves.

The group was truly multi ethnic and the output just vindicated my belief that Music can be a Great Unifier.

The performance/stage is not even remotely comparable to the December season concert in Music Academy, but never the less, it was an enriching experience. There is nothing that quenches a performer’s thirst more than the genuine applause one gets from the audience, not even two bottles of Castle Lager!

A big thanks to my friends Pramod, Sriram and Dhaval for turning up early for the event, and standing up (literally), for me!

If you are interested in catching glimpses of Shivamani II in the making, feel free to mail me, and I will send across the photos/video clips, proudly presented to you by ace photographer Pramod!

Autobiography of an Eternal Wannabe

In this season of endless biographies, authorized and unauthorized, and autobiographies,we are confronted with a precarious situation. Suneil Shetty is planning to release his autobiography “ The Eternal Wannabe”.

I have managed to lay my hands on the manuscript of the Preface to this book, using my far reaching contacts.. So read on as it might help you in knowing whats in store when you end up in the nearest Landmark Store to grab your copy

Preface

When my son Aahan brought me his English Homework book, and asked me to read his essay ‘Autobiography of a two rupee note’, my thoughts began to wander. Am I not worth even two rupees, for no one has even thought about a biography on me. Not to feel utterly disappointed, I took it upon myself to show the world who Suneil Shetty is.

My sincere thanks to the Bollywood producers who have refused to queue up in front of my house, with offers, for that has given me all the time in the world to finish this work. I have divided this book into two broad phases of my life- namely Being Sunil, and Being Suneil.

This book captures very little of my childhood, because I presume that when people are positively uninterested about me when I am a veteran Bollywood actor, their interest in my childhood can be no better.

The Eternal Wannabe is a vehicle in which I am going to take you through the journey of my career path, from the days when I wanted to be the number 1 action hero, before Akshay stormed his way into the scene, and then moves on to the days when I wanted to be a wholesome actor , before Aamir and Shah Rukh took over. And the journey doesn’t stop there.

Then I wanted to be a comedy actor, after the miracle hit Hera Pheri , before all three mentioned above took away the shine from me. I even touch upon the phase when I wanted to be a sought after villain after Main Hoon Na.
It then takes you through the most successful phase of my life, which is acting as the m+nth hero of any movie, and use Bollywood as a cash cow and not as a medium to attain glory.

Come, join me in this event filled journey and you will have the ride of your life.

Forever Yours,
Suneil

Lecture From the Sun to a Son

I had to get up and travel to the city real early today morning for an appointment. It was such a pleasant sight to see the sun real bright as early as 6:30.And this is what the Sun had to tell me, to ensure that I enjoy every moment of this spring...

Where were you yesterday morning
Were you hiding under the blanket?
Where were you yesterday morning
Were you still dreaming big time ?

I wait for you every morning
To get a glimpse of the fresh you
And you fail to meet me
When I am young and bright

I don’t want to leave you
In the influence of the dark
So I illuminate your world
Shining through the Moon

Has there ever been a day
When I have failed to rise
Seen the best and the worst
But never shrunk or shrugged

Its time for you to wake up
Enjoy the genuine brightness
Soak up in the real warmth
And liven up your own world!

A favour for Rahul -Part II

We continue on some more FAQs that will help Rahul meet the press with a straight bat in WC 2007!

MC: The toss was very crucial for this important match….

Scenario 1: Rahul wins the toss, elects to bat and bats out the opposition from the match

Rahul: Of course, in big games like these, you would love to have a little bit of luck going your way,and yes, the toss was very vital, as we were far more comfortable in bat out the opposition out of the match, then chase a total on this pitch.

Scenario 2: Rahul loses the toss, chases and wins the match

Rahul: The result should be determined by the team that emerges stronger in any given situation, and I don’t think the toss really has an impact on the outcome of the match.

MC: So how important is Tendulkar factor for the Men in Blue

Scenario 1: Sachin has scored a stunning run a ball 80 that has helped India win against Pakistan

Rahul: The effect of Sachin’s presence can never be explained in words. He simply lifts the morale of the side, and has an aura that keeps the team buoyant, and more he plays more the team gains

Scenario2: Sachin has been sent back home because of tennis elbow injury relapse and India lose to Pakistan

Rahul: Well, Sachin is a great player in his own right, but I think each one of us have to understand our responsibility and play to the full of our potential. Only then can the team click in the long run (*And you thot I will say Sachin is a thing of the past like what Veeru said about Dhaadha.. Sorry*)

MC: Irfan Pathan at Number 3. Is it still a unanimous ‘think tank’ decision?

Scenario 1: Irfan scores a match winning half century in an otherwise low scoring game

Rahul: Yes, We have fixed the slot for him, and as an all rounder he is only emerging with more promise after every outing (*just don’t think about his eight previous failures during this reply*)

Scenario 2: Irfan fails miserably at number 3, for the third time, and his bowling is also impacted because of this

Rahul: Well, Irfan is young and extremely talented. The world is not going to end after this World Cup for him. We are grooming him for the WC 2011, and what better stage than this to work on all permutations available as far as he is concerned (*I am tired of Irfan bashing.. may be this will keep the media silent for atleast two and a half years*)

So my friends, as you can all see, I am really investing time to help out Rahul with his media management, so that he can fully focus on his cricket and his on field thought leadership, rather than increasing wrinkles on his forehead fretting about the next round of media bashing. Wish me luck in this endeavour!

Punch Pandi's plea: In the absence of innovative stroke play or innovative captaincy, I only wish Dravid atleast develops an innovative media plan, and not make it so predictable, in the absence of which, I will not watch even the half a dozen matches that I watch them play.

A favour for Rahul

After seeing the Indian Cricket Team lose convincingly to the Aussies, I had a rather disturbed sleep. The only silver lining in my sleep was when Rahul Dravid came in my dream and asked me to be his ‘media managing’ mentor during India’s World Cup 2007 campaign. Though I am not sure how long the tourney will last in the tournament , I am taking the task very seriously believe it or not, I have already started to pen an FAQ manual for the Captain of the Boyz in Blue(s).


Question 1:

MC: So what do you think is the main reason for the defeat?

Situation 1 : India has not played in a one day for about two months prior to the tournament.

Rahul: Since this is the first gane in two months, the players were a bit rusted, and we are only bound to improve after a few games

Situation 2: India has played a couple of unwarranted triangulars before the start of the WC

Rahul: We have had a lot of cricket in the last two months, and it is just that the boys are feeling a bit jaded. We are looking forward to the three day break before we take on Kenya, which is a critical encounter

Question2

MC: So, what do you think the morale of the team is going to be ahead of the crucial match against Pakistan?

Situation 1: India has had a thumping victory against Kenya in the previous match

Rahul: Well, you know, it is always important to have a win under your belt before you take on the big names in the tournament, so the morale would be upbeat, and the boys are ready for the challenge

Situation 2: Kenya sets up the first upset in the tournament beating India by 4 wickets

Rahul: Well, you know, it really doesn’t matter what happened in the previous match. This is cricket, you lose some and win some. So it is imperative to take each match in isolation and concentrate hard. The boys morale would be positive by the time the match starts. No two ways about it.

Question 3:

MC: Congrats on a great performance. Your century really helped India post that big score which was beyond the reach of the

Situation 1: Rahul opens the innings with Sachin

Rahul: When you have 300+ as the target you are looking to set for the opposition, the openers must set up the contest and that is precisely what I did. When the openers set the ball rolling, it is easier for the middle order to capitalize on the start

Situation 2: Rahul has batted at number 5 and scores the century

Rahul: For a big score, it is extremely important that the middle order comes to the party irrespective of the start the openers had given. That is why we have seven batsmen and not just two…(*to end with a ‘gotcha’ kinda smile*)

To be continued…

Jis Des mein Yarra Behethi Hei

Sometimes in pusrsuit of the abstract,the tangibles turn invisible. Just to ensure that we are not lost in profound thoughts on this blog, here goes a small poem on Melbourne, the city that is currently sponsoring my daily bread...

Paanch Gali ka Shehar Hei
Beech mein Yarra Nadhi Hei
Swasth Hawa Masth Jagah
Ye He Melbourne Meri Jaan

Dhin Mein Poora Kaam
Shaam Ko Thoda Guppa
Jiyo Zindagi Aman Se
Ye He Melbourne Meri Jaan

Har Dhin Mein Chaar Mousam
Chaaron Or Dikhegi Hariyali
Kitne Baag aur Kitne Maidhan
Ye He Melbourne Meri Jaan

Jahaan Dekho Romance Hei
Khel Khood mein Shauk Hei
Faltoo Chinta Karna Joke Hei
Ye He Melbourne Meri Jaan

Not all choices are no-brainers

Game for some senti stuff?.. then read on.. if you think you dont want to spoil the weekend with a heavy read, you can keep this for Monday.. it might be a bit light compared to work!

God works overtime most time of the year, deciding for you, who one's parents should be, who is destined to be born as your brother or sister, and even has dedicated staff working for him in this place called heaven, where they are busy making matches. So technically, you don’t even land up choosing your spouse, though you think you have taken part in the exercise.

So having done all this, he goes on a vacation once in a while, and he lets it open for his creations to choose people to populate the space designated for friends. So here we are trying desperately to figure out,
who could fit the bill as your best friend from whom you can take his /her pencil in school without his/her permission,
the chosen one with whom you can share a bite of your lunch,
the one with whom you can go the cinema after bunking college,
share secrets about your crushes,
the one whose shoulders you can take for granted to lean on when in need
the one whom you are confident would place the relationship above personal interests

And man, do we succeed in this simple task…. I cant talk on behalf of any one else, but I think the friend has a responsibility greater than that of any parent, brother, sister or a cousin, as this relationship has not been thrust on you by The Almighty, but one is gifted this supreme role by someone who is just like you, the chosen one…..

Punch Pandi Speak: Friends may be taken for granted, but not friendship

50 Not Out..

This is post number 50 on vaaman… and it’s a milestone that gives me a decent level of satisfaction, and I hope I have given you a little bit of variety and an element of unpredictability as to what my new post would cover.

I sincerely thank you for taking time off to visit my blog irrespective of how regularly you do this, and I only hope that I can entertain you enough to bring you back on to this page, and manage to leave a frown in your face, when you don’t find an update.

The blogging platform has helped me lots in knowing new people and making new friends. Blogging has opened my eyes to views others hold on topics, that I think deserve atleast 500 words of web space. It has also made me read the posts of fellow bloggers, and it certainly helps to know what fellow common man thinks and not just what the Netas say that they are thinking.

Its been a pleasure presenting my thoughts to you, and I shall do all that I can, to keep this going, and keep raising the bar as we progress in this journey

Well begun is half done, but unless it is fully done, the result is better than none (This part of unwarranted filasafee is brought to you by Arun :) )

Cheers!

Birthdays and the Elusive extra toffee

Today I had this pleasant and unique experience of chatting simultaneously with two of my ‘jigree’ dosths who wore their birthday dresses to school on the same day ,14 years ago!

On that note here is yet another attempt to transport you through this small journey into early school life… “Nyaabagam Varudhe Part III”

My birthday falls in end of April, and so, I never had the opportunity to go to school wearing the newly bought dress on my birthdays. But that doesn’t stop one’s excitement when it is any of the class mate’s birthdays.

The pride that the b’day baby’s face exuded, the suspense factor of what toffee was in store, and which class the sweets would be distributed were just some of the highlights.

If two classmates celebrate their birthday on the same day, even better. One toffee is finished pre lunch and the other in the second half. And that is the day when the kid wins new friends, as the classmates are hopeful of getting that extra caramel chocolate in the second interval from out of the reserves stored in the side pocket of the school bag!

And the birthday kids are no less shaane.. They use this as an opportunity and go that extra mile and offer one extra chocolate to please their favourite teacher.. “ Please take one more, Miss” .. If only the teachers were kind enough to acknowledge this and knock off a few blackmarks off the kids’ names…

Waiting for another spark to be aroused to embark on “Nyaabagam Varudhe Part IV”.. This is, after all the season of sequels in Bollywood too..

It's Tamil this time!

Why spare my mother tongue.. after torturing all my readers with poems in English, I thought I will pen one in Tamil.. So here it goes!

Mounam Saadhikum Idhazhgale
Kolam Podum Kolusu Kaalgale
Idhu Kaadhala Verum kaanala
Unarchiku Vizhigal Or Kaavala

Vandhaai Paarthaai Venraaiye
Caesar Kulathu Pen neeyo
Inum Kidaikavilai En Idhayam
Thirudiyadhu azhagiya theeyo

Malargalin Vaasam Nee Dhaano
Naan Utkollum Swaasam Nee Dhaano
Mounathin Vilakkam Ariyeno
Un Idhayathil Vasipadhu Adiyeno

Idhu eppadi irukku ;)